Saturday, December 11, 2010

My Pussy has no (Proper) Name

Right...so I donno what to call my pussy when I'm trying to think in Telugu. It's sad enuff that I hardly think in Telugu anymore, but well...occasionally, I do have the odd mustachioed-south-Indian-guy fantasy! (yes ladies, I'm one of those almost-extinct chicks who likes guys with mustaches and DONT GAG! I like it) And as much as I'd like to continue all the erotic talk (??) in English, it does come up short (haha!). No matter how much we've all Anglicized/Americanized ourselves, some shit just cannot be said in Engl-peech!

To prove my point, inspired by the Vagina Monologues, i smsed my girlfriends (who come from all corners of India, btw) to tell me what the word for "vagina" was in their mother tongue...the PROPER, everyday word...not the slang/derogatory names nor the formal, "literary" word. Only one chick managed to give me a word. (FYI, 'sazu' in Mizo.) Moreover, only some of them knew the word(s), but they were invariably curses, the root words of curses or the "formal" words. Let me also throw in that all of these girls are highly educated and read voraciously, albeit mostly in English, I guess. The relevance of this fact is that they are all also sexually aware and some are sexually active. Oh balls...they all have atleast read Mills and Boons atleast once and I am prolly safe in assuming that they've all also watched porn.

I wonder how many actually masturbate tho. Yea, cant ask all of them. I know some tried and didnt know how to...so just let it be. Some, luckily dont have to (Gawd, I hate you!) and some, like me, have made it their nightly ritual.THAT is why it takes me so long to sleep, Mom, altho I'm dog tired! Coz it effin takes FOREVER to get there. I'm turning 25 soon...and long ago, I promised myself a vibrator for this birthday. I know its not happening and the worst thing is, even if I laid my hands on one, I wudnt use it. The "Indian Gal" in me still thinks it is shameful. But screw it, even in a moment of desperation, HOW WUD I GET ONE?? Oh the shame of being seen anywhere around a sex toy shop...oh wait, they dont even HAVE them in India! WTF!

I digress, but I'm talking about getting toys for a body part that doesnt even have a name. Its only a disgusting place....as one friend jokingly called it, "Where the Sun Never Shines," something to curse. Or, its a holy place, elevated to the SACRED. References to the Shivalingam, of course. But when do we actually get to just talking about it and having fun?? Why does my pussy remain nameless even today, when we have reached to the prestigious position of the second most populated country in the goddam WORLD??

5 comments:

  1. I love guys with mustaches too!!!

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  2. yoni?

    but i didn't know there was an "Indian Girl" in anyone who did their high school in the US.

    www.arrangedindianmarriage.blogspot.com

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  3. @ runawaybride...'yoni' has slightly literary connotations.

    And trust me, there are plenty of "Indian Girls" who do their high schools in the US. Some stay that way, some dont and some, like me, come back home! Now tho, it seems like I have to go define "Indian"!! Lolz

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  4. This is the land of natural produce, after all. Maybe you should consider going green. Cucumbers, anyone?

    After all, when in Rome...

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  5. Vagina Monologues made me cry the first time i read it 12 years ago.
    sex toys can be purchased online :)
    check out www.adameve.com

    ReplyDelete